Comment Wall September 21, 2020 / admin / 14 Comments Image courtesy of PikPNG. Uncategorized Comment Wall Previous post Week Three Topic Research: Vengeance of the Sun God Next post Storybook Plan 14 Comments Cade December 9, 2020 at 11:53 pm Hi Eden, I first way to say I think it is really cool you picked up this project from last semester. You were able to get back into it seamlessly. Your stories kept me engaged as a reader from start to finish. I really enjoyed how you included the summaries. That way if people did not have time or did not want to read the whole thing they still would get the gist of things. As the semester comes to a close I think you did an amazing job and should be proud of your work. Hope the end of your semester is closing out well! Reply Kylie Markham December 7, 2020 at 11:51 am Hi Eden! I am extremely impressed with your website. It is beautiful! It is also very organized which makes it so much easier for a classmate to navigate and read through it. I am also impressed with all of your stories you have provided on your website. I also love the name of your website as well. I really enjoyed reading your introduction post. Those are always my favorite posts to read from other classmates. I think it is also cool that you provided summaries of all of your stories on your website. Overall I think you did a great job and I hope you have a great rest of your semester. Reply Erin Lockhart December 7, 2020 at 8:15 am Hi Eden! I absolutely loved reading your Storybook. It’s very obvious how much thought and time you’ve committed to this project! The introduction that you wrote was super detailed and I love that you made it sound like a conversation with someone rather than just telling people what the project was about. You also had an amazing thought with the summary beforehand. Some people may not have the time to reread the entire first story, so you added a summary of your own instead! This was a brilliant idea that you transformed into the remaining chapters of your project as well when you included a quick reflection of the previous chapter before continuing the story. Overall, I think your project flows like a true book and it looks amazing! Great job! Reply Rachel Averitt December 6, 2020 at 7:26 pm Hi Eden! First of all, you’re an amazing writer. I can tell how much thought you’ve put into your stories. Your decision to merge Greek and Indian mythologies is so interesting and it works really well! One thing you also do very well is give context to your stories in your Introduction and Author’s Notes. I noticed in your Author’s Note that you’re a huge Percy Jackson fan. Your characterization of Athena definitely reminded me of Anabeth so it was fun to see that that was your actual inspiration. My only criticism is that I think you could find a better picture of a map of the Agean! Seriously, this is one of the best Storybooks I’ve seen. Great job! Reply Natalie December 3, 2020 at 10:01 pm Hi Eden! First of all, I think it is so cool that you studied with Dr. Laura Gibbs last semester and that you loved your project so much that you wanted to continue it! Knowing that you are that passionate about it always makes it more fun to read! I love that you included a recap of your first project in case the reader does not have time to read both entire projects. I think you did a great job at structuring your stories and finding the perfect places for paragraph breaks. The only note I have is to maybe make the author’s note a different font or color or something, as it sort of blends right into the story as a whole. You did a great job and I so enjoyed reading your project! It was written so well! Reply Adam K November 30, 2020 at 9:49 am Hey Eden! First, I would like to mention how I love your name! I do not think I have ever met an Eden before so that is super cool. Also, I really freaking loved going through your storybook and I could tell a TON of effort had been put into it over the semesters. You certainly have a skill for writing and I hope you continue to do so because your stories were gripping and helped me as a reader get immersed into the world that you created. Then detail in the story of Proteus was such an added bonus because again I felt like I was underwater watching these events unfold! I like how they adventures of Proteus continued in the second story as well with the introduction of Athena and Vishnu! Overall, I really enjoyed reading your stories and scrolling through your storybook page! Keep up the good work and I hope you have a good rest of the semester and dun holiday break. Reply Long Ngo November 15, 2020 at 1:12 pm Hi Eden, First off, I very much appreciate the dedication that you had to continue the storybook from Indian Mythothology all the way here to the new class! Like you, I was also in the same class prior, but never really thought about continuing the storybook to this new one. That would’ve probably have saved some time! Anyways, in terms of the general theme of your storybook itself, I found it fascinating that you incorporated both Indian and Greek folklore all in one storybook — it shows how easily connected the two can be. All it needs is a little bit of creativity, right? I like how for the introduction, you gave a very thorough, yet concise, run-through of the stories prior as well as the folklore that inspired the crossover between the two myth genres. I will say that in terms of the website itself, I think you can add more to the design to really make your stories pop and memorable. All in all, I look forward to reading more from you in the future! Reply Zohaib Thayani November 8, 2020 at 10:54 pm Hey, Eden! The outlay and design of your website is incredible! I love the colors, fonts, and overall designs used to capture and sustain your readers. Not only the overall art and choice of images, but also the titles of your pieces made your overall storybook extremely attractive (as in, wanting to be read!). I feel like it is really important to have this key method of obtaining readers as well as grabbing their attention immediately to have them read your pieces, and you did just that! Your introduction had immense amount of details, more than I have seen in other storybooks, and it allowed me to get a very good and detailed glimpse as to what your stories are going to be about and how you will tie them all together. With this, I feel like reading your future stories will come a lot easier to everyone! You really set yourself up for success. Good job. Reply Katie November 3, 2020 at 11:17 am Hi Eden! Your website is very intriguing and captured my attention instantly. The orange theme pairs with the ‘Vengeance of the Sun God’ title perfectly. I like how you continued on from your project last semester, adding more content to make the story grow. I wish I could have read your stories from part 1! The summaries on the introduction page helped fill me in quickly and really prepared me for what was to come. Your first story was very enjoyable to read, and I feel like within a short time I got to really know some of the characters. In the second story I was impressed by how much detail and description you put into every paragraph. For example, in the final paragraph you elaborated on the weaving process and it really brought the entire scenario to life. You could have easily said that “Athena weaved wings onto Proteus”… but the fact you elaborated on it and made the whole part engaging really advanced the whole story. Great job! Reply Pierce October 21, 2020 at 10:18 am Hi Eden, I first want to say that I am so impressed with your website it is obvious that you have experience because everything looks so good and professional. I love your introduction and how you not only linked your other website that I did skim and then took the time to describe what happened for people who are too busy. I was seriously blown away and it only made me more interested in your story and I think that it is so awesome that you are getting the chance to finish what you started. You honestly are making me consider to take Indian epics in the spring before I graduate for that exact reason. I have no criticism of your writing it was so fun to read and I was hooked the moment I started reading you are very talented and I seriously had such a good time reading your story. I can’t wait to come back and read more this was seriously so good. Reply CJ Campbell October 19, 2020 at 3:37 am Hi Eden! Firstly, I think it’s awesome that you’ve chosen to continue on with the story that you’ve started in a previous semester so as not to leave it left unfinished! As a writer myself, I totally understand wanting to continue what you’ve started, and I think it’s great to see you doing so! The world can always use more writers! (I’m studying Professional Writing, and currently working on writing 50k words of a book for one of my classes, which is one of four story major story projects I’m working on currently.) I really like how you’ve laid out the story for the class, and the things you worked into it to make it easy to pick up were very well done! I did not have time to read the first half of the story, but I had a very solid understanding of the story so far thanks to your introduction, so great job! Also, I really liked your inclusion of a section covering the events of the previous chapter at the top of each, it’s really useful for stories that are being pushed out piece by piece like this! Wishing you the best with completing your story! Reply Mirza Beg October 18, 2020 at 7:18 pm Hi Eden! I’m really enjoying your storybook/novella. I read your intro, and chapters 1 and 2. I really like your writing style. It feels like the events are happening in a bigger world. I was a bit curious about Athena and Poseidon’s rivalry though. Was this something from your other storybook or was this something that is part of the original mythology? Also, I did not read your other storybook, but how did the different versions of the gods work? Are they like different personalities? Does Proteus have two personalitie as well? I liked how you got around getting Icarus out of the water. I was wondering why the seals were so friendly with Icarus though. Were they ordered to bring him to Proteus? If Icarus did a bad thing by slaying the eagles, then why is he being saved now? What plans do they still have for him? Reply Robbie Johnson October 4, 2020 at 5:55 pm I was blown away by the way you wrote your introduction. First, it was so easy to read and I felt like I was having a real conversation with you rather than just reading something. You made it entertaining and personable and it really engaged me and made me want to keep reading. Second, I loved that you put a link to your old story and even gave a summary for people that don’t have the time to read the old story. I really loved your summaries and it felt like the “Previous On” feature that shows have on Netflix. This is incredibly well written and very enjoyable to read. I also like the vibe of the page and I think it really fits your stories and writing style. Lastly, I found this entire page to be a great success and love that you left off your story from the last class you took and are continuing the process with this class. I could not find much wrong with this so congratulations on your great writing ability! Reply admin (Post author) October 8, 2020 at 1:44 pm Thank you, Robbie! Dr. Gibbs gave a lot of input into how I should prep the readers for Part 2. I’m glad to hear that it’s doing what I’m wanting it to do! Reply Leave a Reply Cancel replyYour email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment Notify me of followup comments via e-mail Name * Email * Website Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.